Funny: Top Dumbest Pieces of Travel Advice

I decided to put together a list of some of the most outlandish travel advice I’ve stumbled upon during my travels. We’re not talking about your usual travel hacks here – these are the kind of tips that make your brow go ‘Really?’

What people say on Reddit

When people recommend skipping entire cities like Rome full of interesting stuff just because they are “touristy”. I don’t love crowds myself but I’m willing to endure them when the place is rightfully popular.

One person on Instagram recommended Verona as an alternative to Rome. Verona is nice but it’s no Rome.

throway3451

A few months ago I was doing tourism in a different city in my country with some friends from USA ( first time for them). We were watching all the classic tourist spots ( churchs, old buildings, fonts and things like that ) and one guys saw a TikTok and was pushing to see a local market to “feel the real vibes of the city “. We went there and spent like 5 minutes there because was the most random place to go, just a random market for locals to get ingredients for food and things like that.

guancarlos

It’s just obnoxious arrogant people trying to think they’re better than everyone because “omg I went to “blah blah” rather than “super famous archaeological site” and saw literally nothing there because there’s literally no reason to go there at all but I absolutely loved it cos there’s no tourists and I hate touristic things”

Wtf… popular places thst tourists go to are popular for a reason. Stop acting like you’re going to find the next big thing on instagram

raiigiic

This happened to me in Paris on the metro. I had been buying those little tickets but kept confusing which ones were used or not and then decided to start throwing them out as soon as I used them. Got stopped at the destination and I didn’t have my ticket with me. Luckily, I could explain in French that I didn’t understand the system well enough and that I just started throwing them out because I was lazy. I told the same story to the officers boss and she let me go with a warning.

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So, I hope this list brings a smile to your face and maybe even a chuckle or two.

Skip Rome (Venice, New York, etc..), it’s too crowded.

This is just stupid. Some places are touristy for a reason. Don’t skip it even if you don’t like crowds, and you can always get up earlier.

Pack heavy, just in case.

Bringing everything but the kitchen sink, because who knows when you’ll need that snowsuit in the Bahamas?

Exchange money at the airport.

It’s known for the best rates, right? (Spoiler: No, it’s not, it is usually the worst.)

Do Paris as a local.

Okay, now what? Stay in the outskirts, take a long commute during rush hour, look for a parking space, do grocery shopping at 7 pm, and a laundromat session? No, you don’t want to be a local on your travels.

Go to Spain in August.

No. It’s hot, crowded, and it’s the traditional vacation month for locals. Maybe, exploring the North would be a bit more pleasant.

Have a comfortable flight.

For some, it’s just impossible. For some, it’s often recommended to fly business/first class. Just like that, easy, right? However, you can definitely make your long flight a bit more comfortable without paying x3-x10.

You can be spontaneous.

Going to New York, Venice, or Paris without making any hotel reservations is unwise and can lead to numerous inconveniences and a lighter wallet. At the same time, you don’t want to be too rigid with your vacation planning. Just think of accomodations in the first place, and you will be OK.

Compare international McDonalds with your local one.

Why try local cuisine when you can have the same burger you eat at home?

You can’t go to Germany/Japan/Dubai/Thailand on your own, it’s too dangerous.

While it’s natural to have concerns and axiety about safety when traveling, it is not that dangerous. Do your research, stay in well-reviewed accommodations, keep in touch regularly, take necessary precautions to stay safe, and … don’t be an idiot. That’s it!

Find the absolute cheapest way to travel.

Saving money is totally valid, but don’t take it way too far and let it dominate your body and soul. 

Learn basic phrases in the local language.

It’s not that necessary, and you never know which phrase you might need in a conversation. For complicated situations, you just need to know English and have your translation app with you. Otherwise, local staff don’t really care about you being polite by using some native phrases. Thousands of travelers pass by them each year, so don’t bother.

Ignore local customs and dress codes: Cultural sensitivity is overrated, right?

Hitchhiking is safe everywhere: It’s a free ride, and everyone is trustworthy.

Keep all your money in one place and rely solely on credit cards: Because ATMs and card acceptance are universal, and no way you’re going to lose your wallet, right?

Avoid street food: Surely, every street vendor leads to food poisoning.

Treat Bargaining as a competitive sport: The goal is to win, not to respect locals.

Photograph everything, experience nothing: Living through a camera lens is the best way to travel.

So, that is it.

Now it’s your turn. What have been the worst travel tips you’ve been given? 😎